Tuesday, June 26, 2012

A Cold Cup Of Coffee: Ratchet vs Righteous

This is a special edition of A Moment With Morris. This is part of an ongoing series I affectionately titled "A Cold Cup of Coffee". Bringing you real life without the sweeteners, a cold and sometimes bitter, but always necessary sip of reality. This time we're looking at, “Ratchet versus Righteous”.

Now in previous “Moments” the battle of Manhood vs. Bitchassness has been addressed. The struggle for control over the next generation of males on this planet. Responsibility, education, determination is up against whining, unmotivated, entitlement. As the war rages on a new battle has arose, and this time it’s women’s turn to take up arms!

Where it was once all quiet on the Woman front, now looks like Normandy! Who’s pitted against one another you might ask..? Righteous practices and morals of the past are engaged in battle with this “bottom bitch” Ratchet behavior of the future. (See “Pimps Up, Love Down”) Just as men are in the midst of our battle to save Manhood, you ladies have been called upon to step up and fight for the preservation and appreciation of women.

Now some of you may be unfamiliar with “Ratchet” behavior, so here’s a quick tutorial:

Here are a few signs to let you know if you’re “Ratchet”:

If you’ve ever been in a fight…at a daycare center…

If you’ve ever worn a leopard print cat suit…to church…

If there are more colors in your hair than in a pack of “Skittles” yet none of them are your natural color…

If you’ve ever had multiple “one night stands” in the SAME night…

If you’ve ever had your baby dancing like he OR she is auditioning for “Twerk Team 2025”…

Now that we’re caught up…

Also don’t get me wrong when I refer to “Team Righteous”. That doesn’t mean I’m talking about just the holiest, sanctified chaste ladies of the Lord, I just mean the ones that have basic morality down and don’t exhibit extreme levels of “hoe-ish” behavior. These women aren’t perfect, but they know how to properly conduct themselves.

We good? Ok…

“Ratchet” may be a newer term but their mission is old. In the past we’ve called them; loose, hoes, hoochies, floosies, tramps, whores & a series of other not so friendly names. If we’ve had these terms forever what’s changed you may ask? Ratchets much like Bitchassness has had the luxury of no resistance. Quality women have stepped aside to live their own lives and didn’t bother to look back to help guide the next wave of women behind them. Claire Huxtable has been replaced by Kim Kardashian as tv’s female influence,. Now that we’re a couple of generations deep in this b.s. and nonsense the little girls of today don’t think anything’s wrong.

These “women” and much like their behavior I use the term loosely, have infiltrated almost every level of our society. These “For The Love Of Real Basketball Ratchet Housewives In Jersey” have put their stamp on everything! I’m seeing little girls walking down the street looking like they’re “walking the streets”. This goes so far beyond just hoe-ish tendencies. True, hoes have always had their place in our society, but you could shame a hoe! Ratchets do their dirt in the light! They thrive on it! They’re like mutant cockroaches!

Let’s take it back to the old days, keeping it real, Elizabeth Taylor, Joan Crawford, Marilyn Monroe, Billie Holiday, Lena Horne, Diana Ross & more all exhibited Ratchet-like behavior during their time and we cheered them. The difference is they knew how to reel it in. They knew the proper way to behave and when to wild out. Today’s little girls aren’t getting enough of that necessary foundation. They don’t know the difference…and they don’t care.

Ladies we need your help. We need you to help smack some of these little girls back in line. Snatch ‘em up by their multi-colored extensions, take a damp towel to that 2 pounds of make up and tell them to put some clothes on!

Men a lot of this is our fault. Too much Bitchassness has led to not enough men being REAL fathers to their daughters. By not being there and letting her know she’s pretty and valued these little girls are running to guys in skinny jeans for validation…skinny jeans!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, we are at war! Ratchets and Bitchassness need to fear us like roaches do “Raid!“ Ladies and gentlemen batten down the hatches…

And in the words of the great Bette Davis…

“Fasten your seatbelts, It’s going to be a bumpy night.”

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2 comments:

  1. "chaste" <--the pedant in me couldn't let that slide

    Awesome article. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete